I have just searched for a recipe for this ever-ripening pineapple on our countertop; lo but do I find some historical commentary on that curious fruit from Mrs. Beeton herself:
THE PINEAPPLE IN HEATHENDOM.—Heathen nations invented protective divinities for their orchards (such as Pomona, Vertumnus, Priapus, &c.), and benevolent patrons for their fruits: thus, the olive-tree grew under the auspices of Minerva; the Muses cherished the palm-tree, Bacchus the fig and grape, and the pine and its cone were consecrated to the great Cyble.
Oh, those wacky heathen nations. But "the pine and its cone"? Is she confusing pineapples and pine cones? The emphasis is not mine.
At any rate, it appears we will be enjoying the pineapple raw as all Beeton can prescribe for this mysterious fruit is to boil the life out of it.